Val loves Doritos. But, let’s be completely honest everyone loves Doritos. To be utterly honest, I love anything that’s got brightly colored packaging and xtreme slogans. The problem with food like that, other than it completely fatifies you, is that it cost 3 – 4$ a pop. Too much for my meager budget, I’ll tell you that right now. (PS. It is really meager).

Here are two things I make that are absurdly cheap — like, third world cheap — and delicious.

Hummus

Hummus is da bomb, yo. It is so easy, forgiving, and — most importantly — cheap. You can eat it on practically anything: pita, stale bread, fresh bread, vegetables, chicken, or anything you can scoop with. It is versatile, comrade. A big tub of hummus, the good stuff, costs around five bucks. You can make your own for under one single greenback. I follow this recipe as a starter and add whatever tickles my fancy — tonight it was cumin. Seriously, it takes about ten minutes.

Two things. First you’ll need some sort of automated food chopping device — either a blender or food processor. Second, tahini is going to cost you. Sure it’ll run you 6 – 8$, but you be able to make your weight in hummus with it.

Popcorn

Did you know Orville Redenbacher runs the world’s largest corn racket from the bottom of his icy cold grave? There is no reason you should ever pay more than 0.25$ for a giant bowl of popcorn. Buy popcorn — like, the kernels — and pop it your damn self. It takes ten minutes, and you can pour REAL BUTTER AND SALT on it. It seems fairly obvious to me.

For a super fun time put some paprika on the finished product and call it a day.